MARRIAGE arranging — looking for SOULMATE!

clarencecosts$20, fakethingsinthesky, liesyourparentstoldyou No Comments

In INDIA, almost all mariages are arranged. Even among the educated middle classes in modern, urban India, marriage is as much a concern of the families as it is of the individuals. So customary is the practice of arranged marriage that there is a special name for a marriage which is not arranged: It is called a “love match.”

Quotes from real Indian girls:

“Of course I care. This is why I must let my parents choose a boy for me. My marriage is too important to be arranged by such an inexperienced person as myself. In such matters it is better to have my parents’ guidance.”

“Meeting with a lot of different people doesn’t sound like any fun at all. One hears that in America the girls are spending all their time worrying about whether they will meet a man and get married. Here we have a chance to enjoy our life and let our parents do this work and worrying for us.”

This is why I must choose a mate for my dear Olive. I hear India is the future of our world.

Signed,

Olive’s guardian (guardian being defined as defender),

Athena O.

*All credit (referring to the borrowed paragraphs above) goes to the author whom I was intending to plagiarize from, but later decided to credit, Serena Nanda. *

Bad News

fakethingsinthesky, fakeworld, liesalladultstoldyou, liesyourparentstoldyou, liesyourteachertoldyou, setna 409 Comments

I’m sure you all remember our beloved friend Bob the Tester Guy. He was very dear to us. Yesterday at 3AM, secret police shot him with a Wuv Woos PWNing gun. He was dead in seconds. We are pretty sure that the police found his identity through his own set-up conspiracy. I’m not sure how many noticed something at the bottom of the first post:

“Hi, I’m Bob the Tester Guy and I like to write about true conspiracies. Everyone knows that snopes is controlled by people who don’t want you to know the truth, so I’m here to inform you about what is true and what snopes actually got right.

Here’s my first ever link to snopes.

OK! So, hopefully you read that, well here’s why snopes got it wrong:

Now most of you probably don’t even know what Wingdings is! Congratz! You’ve never wasted all your time in Microsoft Word switching the fonts of that really important paper. Or maybe you don’t have Microsoft, whatever. Me neither, so I think there’s no reason other than to let out secret messages with it. So I looked it up a bit and found that there really is no reason that I can see anway!

Great! So now, not only do evil corporations send secret messages, but they do it publicly, even on your own computer! No one can type everything in the world on Wingdings, so leave that to professionals like me. Obviously, only the really popular stuff’s been looked up, but no doubt there is something to be found if only we knew what we were really looking for!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

IT’S BEEN A GREAT FIRST DAY OF INFORMING YOU OF THE TRUTH.

LOVE

BOB THE TESTER GUYYY

bobthetesterguy  ITSACONSPIRACY”

He had both his username and password^ for the site written down in the post. The police logged on to his account and figured out his personal information. He is survived by his wife, Aunt Jemima Jackson-Guy.

So,

Let us all grieve Bob the Tester Guy’s death, a dear dear friend to us all and especially a special long time friend to Setna,

Athena